American Cars & Dinosaurs

Twas a very ordinary early June day today. It was 75 degrees. Heavy pouring rain alternated with bouts of sunshine. Students had a great deal of trouble keeping themselves in their seats and in a school building. I forgot to mail my brother a birthday card. An e-mail and a phone call will have to do once again.

In the extraordinary news department, the 2nd of the big 3 U.S. automakers filed for bankruptcy protection today. In my lifetime, all 58 years of it, I have seen a lot of economic changes in the U.S. The last year, however, has been a real paradigm shifter. Companies come and companies go, but in the last year they mostly have just gone. And not just a few insignificant ones. Big guys. The world as we know it here on the 14th floor is rapidly changing. I hear strains of Bob Dylan in the distance, "Please get out of the new world if you can't lend a hand, for the times they are a changin'....."

I suppose the auto industry represents, to me, the change that has come. Mind you a lot of auto companies have come and gone in my lifetime. My grandfather owned a Studebaker (manufacturers of Avantis, as well), and then a Rambler (manufacturers of full-size Ramblers and itty-bitty Nash Ramblers) My uncle owned a Kaiser. My other uncle owned a Hudson.

My own father didn't purchase any oddities from companies on their last legs, but he did purchase a couple of Plymouths. Remember Plymouths, they were made by Chrysler Corporation (before they had to be bailed out by the Feds and eventually sold to Daimler-Benz) along with Dodges, Chryslers, and Desotos. Desotos? A car called a Desoto? Oh yeah. They looked just like Dodges and Plymouths. Our 1952 Plymouth was way cooler though. It was green and had a Mayflower (The ship Mayflower that landed at Plymouth, Massachusetts.) hood ornament. Oh that was cool. Not as cool as my Uncle Otis's Pontiac, with the Indian head light up hood ornament, but cool nevertheless.

Like I said a lot of car companies have come and gone. Remember Willys? They made Jeeps. Jeep was bought by American Motors. Remember AMC Gremlins? American Motors went under and Jeep was bought by Chrysler. Oh my god, I almost forgot, International Harvester, the tractor company made vehicles for the road. Before SUV's were a major trend International Scouts (Jeep Wrangler sized) and International Travelalls (Chevy Tahoe sized) were plying the roads of America. Once owned a used International Travelall that I drove to New Orleans and back, and slept in the back on a mattress that I'd thrown in there. I bought it for $400. It had a huge V-8 engine and got about 12 miles per gallon. I named it Thor. It sounded like the god of thunder.

At one time America's roads were populated with nothing but American made cars, and then VW started selling bugs. Then there were a few little Toyotas. My father bought a Toyota Corona in the 1970s. Then came Hondas, and Datsuns (later to become Nissans), and Mitsubishis, and Subarus, and Mazdas. From Europe came the BMWs and Mercedes-Benzs and Fiats and Opels and Jaguars and Volvos and Saabs, not to mention Ferrari, Lamborghini, Alfa Romeo, Bentleys, Rolls Royces, and assorted oddities such as the DeLorean, or the French Citroens and Peugeots. As a teenager I lusted for Austin-Healy Sprites, MG-Bs, and Triumph TR-6s. This was way before the Koreans began hawking Hyundais and Kias in America.

Soon my father's Ford Galaxy was as passe as its predecessor, the Edsel. And not only American cars were vulnerable to passing economic trends. Ever know anyone who drove a Yugo? No I didn't either, but my ex-wife had a Chevy Vega, which makes me remember the Corvair, and my friend, Robert, had a Ford Pinto which makes me remember Unsafe at Any Speed.

Now, in a world gone topsy-turvy, Chrysler is being sold to Fiat (Remember those jokes about Fix It Again Tony. GM is selling off its European brands. (I once owned an Opel Kadet. 40mpg.) Oldsmobile is already gone. Pontiac is following. They're selling off the Saturn brand. Will it survive? All that will be left of the largest auto-maker in the world will be Chevy and Cadillac. (Not sure what they're doing with Hummer, but in a perfect world it would go the way of the dinosaurs.)

Toyota seems poised to replace GM as the world's largest auto-maker and try to shove yet more Camry's down our throats, along with a hefty dose of Prius hybrids. Let us have a moment of silence for those great American cars that are no more, your grandfather's Olds 88, your cousin's GTO, your brother's RT, your friend's Firebird, your uncle's Thunderbird, all of the great American automobiles. They just got bigger and bigger, and like the dinosaurs, they couldn't seem to adapt or evolve in the right direction. Now I find myself behind the wheel of a Mini Cooper, a British company that was bought by BMW, a German company, and marketed successfully for what it is, small, gas-friendly, and fun to drive.

It remains to be seen what will eventually become of the American auto-makers. Will they get over their love affair with minivans and SUV's? Will they manage to go green? Will big fat Americans eventually move beyond big fat American cars? My guess is that we'll have to. We just won't be able to afford them any more. Alas poor Gas Guzzler. I knew him well.