I must admit that it's a darned good day in Paradise, aka Streeterville. It's 72 degrees under clear blue skies at the Mini, a day for opening the sunroof, rolling down the windows, cranking up the radio, and letting the breeze blow back your hair, if you have any to blow. Personally I'm thinking of growing out my eyebrows this summer, kind of comb them back over the top of my head and give myself a curly, wild, hairy topper. Only trouble with that scenario is the fact that they'd be covering my forehead on the way to the top of my head, and growing out the ear hair is equally ridiculous. Had a friend who wanted to market what he called the old Jewish guy Chia Pet. Nothing growing on top, but a ring around the edges of the head and scads sprouting from the ears and nose. For the record, the gentleman in question was Jewish himself, so I suppose he's allowed to make fun.

It's really odd how people feel that they can poke fun at themselves and their family, and their ethnic group, but when someone from outside the group does it, they're off base. It's sort of like when I was a kid and my older brother felt it was OK if he beat on me, but God forbid if somebody else tried that. They were in for a pounding if they messed with his little brother, blood being thicker than water and all. You get the picture.

But more to the point, I've worked with a lot of African-American students and professionals and a great many of them use the N word with impunity, say rude things about each other, call each other names, but oh don't even think about you doing that. That will get you in deep do do. Personally, I would never think of using the N word with anybody, although I am often tempted to call a dumbass a dumbass. That goes beyond racial lines. I've known a great many dumbasses of all races in my lifetime. I'm not fond of any of them.

The same sort of thing goes for most racial or ethnic groups. No one wants to think that someone is badmouthing their particular group. When you start identifying yourself with a particular group and someone says something derogatory about that group in general, by extension they are saying something derogatory about you, in particular. Pisses you off. Forget the fact that sometimes they may have a legitimate point.

When I look at myself, I discover that I too have tendencies in this direction. I grew up in Arkansas, and believe me I have a lot of problems with Arkansas in particular, and the South in general. I don't like rednecks. I don't like country music. I have a problem with fundamentalism. All of the above can be found in copious amounts in Arkansas in particular, and the South in general. Rednecks and fundamentalists and country music fanatics? I'm related to a great many of them. I feel free to make fun to my heart's content. I actually had one branch of the family who had 2 or 3 junked cars in the yard at all times, and who raised hounds for hunting raccoons ("Coons" in the vernacular.) I have no compunction about making fun of these relatives who were the consummate "Redneck Clan." (Although they never belonged to the Klan, to my knowledge.) You don't want to go there, however. Uh, uh.

The thing is, though, I have spent most of my adult life in places like Minneapolis and Chicago, and when someone from one of these lovely metropolises begins making judgements about Arkansas in particular, or the South in general, it definitely gets my hackles up. "Hey Bozo! You're talking about me! I'm from Arkansas in particular, and the South in general, and I am not one of those dumbass redneck, beer swilling, country music listening, pickup driving, gun owning yokels you're making fun of here! Want your ass kicked? Huh?" I usually restrain myself from those kind of tirades, but the inner dialogue is so rich many times.

Babs is much the same way when it comes to Iowa, her state of origin. She badmouths Iowa and small town America on a regular basis, but oh don't go doing it in front of her if you're not from there. She has taught me a thing or three about these attitudes. There are degrees of annoyingness. The very worst is when people from New York choose to look down their noses at your home state, your people. On a 1 to 10 scale of annoyingness, New Yorkers denouncing everything that is not from New York rates a 37.

I am tempted to say that New Yorkers have a chip on their shoulders about people from elsewhere saying anything about their place of origin, but New Yorkers seem to have a chip on their shoulders about everybody and everything that is not New York. Oh damn, just earned the ire of a New Yorker somewhere.

I guess the truth is that it's the grain of truth in all of these ugly stereotypes that make us cringe. We all want to believe that we have risen above it, but when someone drags out those stereotypes and starts pointing fingers, we're not really secure enough to believe that we have. They may be talking about us as individuals, and not about dumbasses in general. Believe me I love the City of Chicago, but it has its share of dumbasses, of a great many races, creeds, colors, religions, sexual proclivities, etc., etc., etc. I've been in Chicago long enough now that when someone from another part of the country, says something about Chicago in particular, and the Midwest in general, I get my hackles up. Oh great! Now I'm defensive about Arkansas, the South, Chicago, the Midwest, white people in general, men, those with artistic inclinations.... Man the list is just getting longer by the day. Maybe I'll just move to New York one day and badmouth everybody. Huh!